I can't believe my baby boy is 1 today! Time sure does fly bye so fast, but I have been so grateful that it has been a good year for us (considering Brock's start in life). I'm sorry this may be a long post but it's good to remember things that happen in life at times and thank heavenly father for bringing this baby boy in our lives. I was so afraid to have another baby because Mariah was so attached to me but the minute I found out I was pregnant she let go. It was a miserable pregnancy for me; I gained tonz of weight fast, I had acid reflux, I was felt nauseated all day, I broke out in PUPS (that totally sucked), and I had to have an emergency c-section. I was so scared when I stopped feeling Brock move and when I was told to go to labor and delivery I got excited because I was going to have this baby early. I remember my doctor, who happened to be a midwife, telling me we can go ahead and move forward with a vaginally delivery but then when I saw the doctor I knew it wasn't going to be good news. The mention of the word c-section scared me to death because I have never every had surgery in my life and I didn't want to have one now! I was ok with it because I wanted my baby to be ok. I remember I was so scared and my lips just quivering as I arrived in the OR. I started to get scared when they pinched me to see if I was numb and when I could feel the pinches it didn't sound good. The doctor gave me some more of the epidural but I still could feel stuff. I remember the doctor saying we need to hurry and they put me to sleep and I don't remember anything after that. I remember waking up crying because it hurt so bad and nurses all in my room but I didn't have my baby. Brandon was in the room making phone calls and I can't remember if he told me about Brock or if it was the nurse. They were getting ready to transport him to Utah Valley Hospital in the NICU at Provo. I was in so much pain and then they brought my baby boy out in this:
It was so hard not being able to see my baby for 3 days and we were in different hospitals. I felt bad for Brandon because he went everyday to both hospitals to visit me and Brock and I am pretty sure he was a mess. The girls went home with Brandon's parents so that they wouldn't have to stay all day in the hospital. I was really shocked that my mom and dad drove all the way from Brigham to American Fork and Provo to see me and my baby and turned around that same night to go back to work the next day. My in laws also came down and Vickie stayed in the hospital with me while Brandon took his dad to Provo to see Brock.
I couldn't believe how together I was while I was in the hospital recovering. I didn't bawl my eyes out I was ok until I was released and was home but no baby. I was in the hospital for 3 days but I came home empty handed. I took it really hard when I got home, I cried and cried. I cried every time we would come home from the NICU because it was sad to see the tiny babies there and not at home with mom and dad, and my baby boy was one of them, but he was the biggest baby in there so that was somewhat on a happier note. It was sad to hear that had to do an MRI and sedated him, it was sad to hear about them finding a small spot on his brain, it was sad to hear whenever he would come back down after doing so good. I couldn't take it anymore. We prayed for Brock and he got a blessing, and the good thing after the blessing he started to do a lot better. We got the call saying he could come home if he was able to nurse without the oxygen. I was told I had to stay overnight at the hospital and nurse him and if he gained weight he was good to go. I stayed overnight but it wasn't good for me at least. I started to get sick again. I was fighting an infection and I had gotten an antibiotic for it but it wasn't working. I was suppose to be readmitted in the hospital but the doctor wanted to go the antibiotic route because he knew my baby was still in the NICU. I had the chills and I was so tired. I didn't want to tell anyone because I wanted my baby to come home and be home when he came home. It was Friday and he was released 10 days after he was born. I got home and was so weak I ended up going back to the hospital and get reopened up and was in there for another 3 days! It was a rough experience for us. I was grateful for all my friends and neighbors that came by to see me in the hospital. Brock has been nothing but a pure miracle and blessing to us and I am so glad that he is here. I love how my girls love him to death, especially Jazmin. He had the cutest personality and I just want to hug him everyday and never let go of him. We love you Brock and hope you had a happy birthday and many more to come. Love you tonz!
Tribute to Brock
1 comment:
I can't believe he is a year old either. He is such a cutie!! All of your kids are! I knew most of your story but not all of it. I had no idea what you and Brock went through. You are such a strong person and I admire you. I can only hope to be half the mom that you are (IF that day actually comes). :o)
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